It's a Whatever and other short pieces
by TakeItToTheMax5
Summary: Filled with all the short pieces I do, anywhere from Poems to prose, horror to humor, monologues to Slam Poems. It'll all be here. Rated T for paranoia.
1. It's a Whatever

**A/N: This is going to be a place where I put all my one shot, clippings, and random pieces. There will be monologues, one shots, poems, drabbles, Slam Poems, etc. Anything and everything. Romance, Adventure, Angst, Horror, humor, slash, everything I can think of.**

**This piece was written at WordsWorth Eat Sleep Write 2012 camp. We were told to write from the perspective of a character we did not create. Part of me laughed because I thought "Hey, I write fanfic, I do this daily." So I chose a specific character, and a specific event. And if you can't guess who it is, then you haven't seen the movie, and why are you here?**

**Please read and Review. BEGGING for reviews. I want to know if I got the character or not.**

* * *

It's a whatever.

In any confrontation, there's collateral damage. Besides, his ass is in some prison. We one, we survived.

It's done.

It's a whatever that I stitched up my own hand after smashing apart the mirror in my room. Looked up and saw blue, could feet it all over again. Could feel him in my head. Tried to punch myself out, ripped apart my hand instead.

It's a whatever.

It's a whatever that I despise that colour now. The stress pills Doc gave me are that shade of blue. I won't take them. Who needs sleep anyway? Tossed my iPod off the side of the Hellicarrier because it was that shade of blue. Told Tony I dropped it in the pool. He bought me a waterproof one of the same colour. I put an arrow through it. My old Carnie flag… well I was going to torch the thing. Couldn't bring myself to do it though. Stared at that blue flag for over and hour before I stashed it in Coulson's old office.

It's a whatever

It's a whatever that the nightmares have been getting worse. That last night, when I was finally conscious enough to move, I sunk the hunting knife I have under my pillow into my calf. Missed the key artery by half an inch.

I don't miss.

It's a whatever.


	2. Tony and Steve Roadtrip Poem

**A/N: At camp we were given the task of creating a five line 'poem' that included the words; Bromance, Winnebago, Volcano, Fluffy, Juicer. It also had to convey an emotion from the list. We chose love obviously, and when I wrote the poem, the only thing I could think about was Tony and Steve Road tripping to New York. It's my first slash, and I'm usually not for writing it… but that was what instantly came to mind. I might actually do a story to this… feel free if you want to, but please tell me and link back to this.**

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This so called Bromance launched us into a Winnebago,

That cross countried us to Where's Fluffy.

Your obsession with the band was a raging volcano,

Making me want to stick your head in the juicer.

But between Wisconsin and Waldo's Bar, I fell in love.


	3. Loki's Slam Poem

**A/N: This is a Slam Poem. Hopefully one of Seven at least. I'm halfway done Clint's right now. Do I get bonus points for posting three times in less than 24 hours?Because it's a slam poem, I will be recording myself perform it… just so you can see where the rhythm and emphasis should be.**

**Yeah, I'll admit, even though Loki mind controlled my favourite character and killed one of my second favourite characters… I do feel kinda sorry for him. And this poem helped me place in a slam competition… so I guess I owe him.**

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Wait, just wait

Listen to me

Please hear me out

Before you put that thing over my mouth

_Let me speak!_

Let me explain

Because I am stuck in here

And I can't get out

I don't want the last thing you see

To be hate in the eyes

Not my eyes

Because I'm trapped in my own mind

Because I was weak.

Okay, I'll admit that I liked it

At times

Cheered the ideas on

When they were fresh

Then the blood started

Senseless violence, with no planning or purpose

You know me

I don't _do_ that!

I don't do that.

Wait, no wait stop!

Let me speak

Please

Give me a second

I need to get my story straight

Sort out the Blues

And the Golds

and the Greens

Figure out what's me

And what is the lie

What is the lie

The lie

_TELL ME!_

Tell me if you ever knew

Tell me if you ever feared me

Tell me if you ever hated what I am

Tell me if any of it was real.

Don't you dare call me brother!

It's another lie, don't you see?

And for Allfathers sake

Don't sully me with your pity

Put the thing on with tears in your eyes

It's just another lie

You're weeping for what I was

Face the truth now

I'm ruled by Blue

Not green

And the Gold was made with tainted blood

I'm not brother

I'm beast

So go ahead, put the muzzle on me

Silence me

You wouldn't listen anyway


	4. When they watched Cabin in the Woods

**A/N: Possible spoilers for Cabin in the Woods. Read at your own risk.**

* * *

It's all Clint's fault, like it always is.

Tony was less than impressed because "Dude, I could have ORDERED it. That is what the StarkBox is _for_!"

Clint told him to go "Soak yer head," which left everyone else wondering what the hell he was talking about.

And it was going to just be the boys. Natasha was going to out Pepper and Maria to the firing range. Maria found it relaxing and Pepper didn't know how to use a gun. It was going to be girls night. But some kid hacked his way into Stark Industries (or thought he did. When Pepper came back and told Tony about it all, he started laughing because the kid had hacked into a decoy system. All the stuff he had downloaded were viruses that killed his computer in half an hour. When Tony told her that, Pepper proceeded to try and strangle him), and Maria came down with the flu.

So Natasha decided to join the sausage fest and enjoy the movie. Which was where it got scary.

The movie started off, and they're all doing the "WTF are we watching" laugh. And if it had just been the boys, it probably would have stayed like that and Cabin in the Woods would go down as a "Did we really watch it? It was so good and so bad all at the same time."

But when The Whore starts making out with the Wolf head, Natasha is giggling like nuts. And this is the woman who doesn't giggle. If she's giggling, someone is going to die tonight. Clint was the only one that knew that, and he kept looking over at her like she was possessed.

When the Jock gets killed, Natasha howled. And that made Thor upset because everyone was commenting on how _that_ is what Thor would look like if he was human. At this point, Clint had actually gotten up and moved over to where Thor was. He had never heard Natasha laugh like that, except for that one time in Budapest. And nothing 'good' happened that night. It's fun to think back on and laugh, but at the time it was not so amusing.

When the Scholar meets his end, she's rolling around on the couch (which she has all to herself). By now Steve and Tony are pressed together, staring at her. No one's really watching the movie, they're just watching Natasha get kicks out of it.

"What did you put in her drink?" Steve asks Tony. Which is stupid, because _no one_ is brave/dumb enough to mess with Natasha's drinks. Except for Clint, and that's when he's had some himself.

"Nothing, I swear. And she's only had three beers. She's downed half a bottle of Russian Vodka before and been tipsy."

When the line "The Virgin Death is optional" happens, Natasha snorts beer out her nose. Now Bruce gets up to leave because The Other Guy is freaking out. "Is she okay? What's going on? Is she possessed?" is basically what The Other Guy says… but in Hulk speak. He's still trying to figure out if he needs to destroy the TV or Red… both of which TUG really doesn't want to do. He likes them both a lot.

The movie ends, and at the last scene Natasha gives this whoop that makes Thor jump. The rest of the boys excuse themselves and she is left sitting there chortling away. Eventually she gets up and heads over to Clint's room. She's been sleeping with him ever since he tore out a chunk of his right kidney and got an infection so bad that the Docs forced him into a drug induced coma for a couple of days to try and help. Nat had been keeping eyes on him since he got back to the tower, which doesn't equate to much sleep really.

But she's still giggling when she walks in, changes, stretches and gets under the sheets. She's still sniggering when an hour passes. Finally Clint makes a comment about walking around to stretch a bit.

Truthfully, he stashes himself in the air vents near Bruce's room. He's still trying to figure out if his partner has gone stark raving mad. If she snaps sometime in the night, he wants to be near the Hulk since that might be the only one to stand a chance against a nutter Nat.

They don't mention that movie ever again. Not even JARVIS.

**A/N:Yeah, so I saw CitW, and... I'm still trying to figure that one out. Might need to watch it again. But the image of Natasha watching it and getting complete and utter kicks out of it popped up near the end, thus creating this.**

**I'm open for requests if you have any. Or prompts. My life is a little less hectic right now, so I want to update this a bit more.**


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